Deborah
As I continue to reflect on taking up my rightful place in the body of Christ, I am concerned about bringing harm to the body. According to the scriptures, we are all connected in a unique way just like the human body. It makes me tremble at the thought of adversely affecting the Lord’s body.
I cried out to the Lord this week and repented for not being there to support the body because I was too consumed with self, for envying someone else’s position in the past and, for not practicing honest biblical fellowship.
This repentance came about as the Lord used my health [click to continue…]
Deborah
My heart is grieved as I think about all of the distractions that take me away from being about my father’s business. I know that distractions can be used as a crafty and cunning device by the adversary. However, I also know that the flesh is so used to dominating in areas of self-centeredness and self-gratification. I struggle at times maintaining discipline especially, when I have health problems.
Most recently, I had a major illness that left me feeling like a dish cloth. The fatigue and all of the intricate details of recovery sucked so much out of me that I could not be about my father’s business. [click to continue…]
Deborah
This is the time of the year when I begin to assess what the constant theme of the year has been. I must confess that it has been forgiveness. Today I am reflecting on the types of incidents that I have experienced over and over again. The repeat offenses are the most trying for me to forgive over and over again.
Most of my challenges have been from those closest to me. With one individual, in particular, I have had to endure countless persecutions, false accusations, compounded with inflicting emotional turmoil. My obligation to extend continuous forgiveness to them borders on the 70 times 70 figure Jesus [click to continue…]
Deborah
God’s Word is my place of quiet retreat; this didn’t come easy. Prior to appropriating God’s Word properly, I endured much grief by mishandling the Word and from not allowing it to renew me.
During that immature time, I sought for prosperity and material gain. I believed that I was entitled to gain while receiving teachings that steered me into viewing the word as a cash cow. It came to a point where I noticed that there were no results.
This trial and error period even led me to align myself with a movement, which emphasized [click to continue…]
Deborah
God’s love is definitely guiding me through the special plans He has for my life. The adversary uses his tactic of interference on numerous accounts to try and spoil God’s plans, but then God gives me a glimpse of the bigger picture in order to strengthen me.
I was scheduled for another oral surgery last week for the third time in the last two months, at the advice of the dentist. The painful infection of a wisdom tooth almost spoiled God’s plans for Thanksgiving. I endured the pain since the Lord gave me the stamina until that following Monday. I had to wait a couple of days since I had to give the antibiotics a chance to combat the infection. Also, the [click to continue…]
Deborah
During Thanksgiving holiday season, I reflected on the many reasons why I should give thanks God. A song rose up in my when I began to reflect on the workmanship of God. The title is “I’ve Got Jesus On the Inside Working On The Outside”. As I began singing the song suddenly, I realized that the words did not seem right. Since I was soul searching at that time, it seemed more appropriate for me that God was working on my inside particularly my heart. However, the work he is doing is flowing to the outside, but it is definitely an inner work.
My spirit began to really understand why 1 Peter 3 teaches that a women’s beauty should be that of a gentle and quiet spirit rather than just outward adornment. [click to continue…]
Deborah
The Lord has allowed my walk to come to a point whereby I must see the importance of practicing the God kind of love. It is the only kind of love that never fails. I am surrounded by so many people who have experienced past hurts and rejections. The lack of approval and acceptance throughout their lives have unfortunately given them the wrong perception when relating to others. They even perceive one as rejecting them when it is not true.
I have become so uncomfortable about being perceived as a contributor to the pain of others. God has given me a desire to cooperate with Him to refute what are [click to continue…]
- Deborah
I have a history of second guessing God to the point of practically missing out on His plans. While deciding on whether it is God’s voice or the leading of the Holy Spirit, I tend to freeze up on occasion.
Recently, I have had to come to grips and realize that reluctance sets in when my plans don’t match up with God’s plans. Initially, I feel as though I am about to make an awful mistake then doubt sets in.
The perfect example was when I felt as though I was off base when it was impressed upon my spirit to leave my employment fours years prior to qualifying for retirement. The reason being was to enter [click to continue…]
Deborah
It appears as though every since my feet hit planet earth that I have had to deal with rejection in some form or fashion. After all love and acceptance is a natural human desire or requirement which seems to be so hard to obtain. Expectations for obtaining this love was deeply dampened until I became intimately involved with Christ. Being committed to Him sheds a whole different light on this need and the God kind of love.
My father deserted the family when I was only four years old. This pulled mother out of the [click to continue…]
Deborah
I thoroughly appreciate the love that God has so liberally given to me. It really does pale in comparison to human love. Recently my appetite has increased more and more for His kind of love to grow in my heart by the Holy Spirit. I thought I was filled.
I am being exposed and realize how I need to be more like Him by allowing his love to grow in me. For years I handed out tracts, explained Roman’s Road to salvation, invited people to church, gave out recorded messages and more as a means of witnessing to others [click to continue…]
Deborah
I am cooperating with the Holy Spirit who is refining my walk to allow the Lord to have total possession. I have found myself holding out in the deeply embedded areas of independence and self sufficiency.
I want to follow the command requiring me to present my body as a living sacrifice. However, I am struggling with loving the Lord with my whole heart, mind and soul because of old trust issues.
In my family financial independence amongst the women is considered an asset. The reason for this was probably due to [click to continue…]
Deborah
During this time of my journey, I am struggling with the flesh warring against the spirit in the area of feeling entitled for a break or timeout. After spending time praying, reading the word, attending and serving at church, sharing or witnessing and fellowshipping, my flesh convinces me that I deserve a break.
Case in point was last week when I was feeling poorly after having oral surgery. I was totally unable to attend the previous week and was still in pain last week. The flesh wants to settle in and drag it out when the Holy Spirit brings [click to continue…]
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